Commencement Address - Walsh University

COMMENCEMENT ADDRESS: WALSH UNIVERSITY
Contact: Amanda Flaig
Sunday, May 2, 2004
Thank you President Jusseaume for this great honor.
To the 2004 graduates of Walsh University-congratulations! You made it! This is your day-a day to celebrate, a day of joy for you and your families.
Let me also congratulate the parents and grandparents, husbands, wives, children, family members, and friends of the graduates-this, too, is your day to celebrate. All the parents and the families here today deserve a round of applause.
A graduation speaker, in a way, is like an intruder at an intimate family gathering. And so, the speaker really needs to understand his or her very limited role, which reminds me of what former New York Governor Mario Cuomo said about the function of a graduation speaker:
"A graduation speaker is similar to the corpse at an Irish wake-for the party to take place, it is necessary for him to be there, but no one really expects him to say very much."
So, with that in mind, what is my role here today? Well, typically, graduation speakers like to give advice. What follows is not so much advice as it is just a few thoughts. And, in collecting those thoughts for this speech, I turned to J.R.R. Tolkien's beloved story, The Hobbit.
Most of you here today are familiar with the Lord of the Rings trilogy, and many avid Tolkien fans will be familiar with The Hobbit. Well before Frodo and Sam set off on their journey, The Hobbit tells the story of the comfortable, content, and somewhat complacent Bilbo Baggins-a hobbit who goes off on an extraordinary journey and returns home a changed creature. He returns with great wisdom, knowledge, and understanding of others. Bilbo records his tales in a fictional book named "There and Back Again." Tolkien prefaces Bilbo's story with this description:
"If you care for journeys there and back, out of the comfortable Western world, over the edge of the Wild, and home again, and can take an interest in a humble [man] -- blessed with a little wisdom and a little courage and considerable good luck-here is a record of such a journey and such a traveler."
Now, from a distance (or close-up for that matter), I could be mistaken for a hobbit-as many of you may have been thinking just a moment ago when I was standing next to the very tall President Jusseaume. It's a good thing my hairy feet are hidden under this robe or you might really think I'm a hobbit and not a United States Senator!
While my journeys have not been epic, at least not to warrant a trilogy of books and blockbuster movies, I have traveled, much like Bilbo Baggins, outside the comfort of our Western world. And today, I'd like to share with you a glimpse of what I have experienced on my own journeys-some of the remarkable things I have seen, a few of the many wonderful people I have met, and just a thought or two about the life lessons I have learned so far. I want to share all this with you because of what the Tolkien stories teach us-and that is that there is so much to be gained from the journeys of others-so much to be learned from the choices people make along the way.
One of the most important things that I have learned in my 57 years is that life is all about choices. On every journey you take, you face choices. At every fork in the road, you make a choice. And it is those decisions that shape our lives.
I'd like to tell you a story about a man-a very humble man, a very ordinary man-but, a man who because of his choices has done some extraordinary things. Father Tom Hagan had a very comfortable life as the Chaplain at Princeton University. It was a good life-a pleasant life in a pleasant environment. At some point, Father Tom traveled to Haiti, and it changed his life forever. He saw some terrible things there-overwhelming things. Abject poverty, filth, squalor, disease-a world very different from the bucolic campus at Princeton.
The amazing thing about Father Tom is that after he saw this unimaginable world of despair in Haiti, he didn't run and hide. He didn't choose the easy road. He said, "I have to help these suffering people-I have to do something." So, he moved to Haiti and starting from scratch, he set up shop in the worst slum in Port-au-Prince. He built a school and a clinic and started a feeding program that provides thousands with a daily nutritious meal.
On one of the many trips that my wife Fran I took to Haiti, Father Tom told us a story about some mothers he came across one day. He said they were mixing mud with spices and putting these mud pies out into the sun and letting them bake. Then, they were feeding them to their children-mud and spices. He went up to see what they were doing and realized that they were doing this because they had no other food to feed their children.
We came back to Haiti about six months later, and Father Tom said to Fran, "I want to show you something, Fran. See that place over there? That's where I found the moms making those mud pies. Now, there's a school." Father Tom had started another little school. And now, at that very same place, Father Tom gives these kids who were once eating mud-he gives them one nutritious meal each day.
Today, with all of the different programs he has in place, Father Tom feeds and educates at least 3,000 children. Because of his choices, these children have a future. Yes, those kids still go home to absolute squalor and shanty-like homes made of concrete and cardboard. And yes, Father Tom knows that he can't solve the overwhelming poverty in Haiti. But, that doesn't stop him or people like Brother Marcel from trying-and succeeding-in improving so many lives.
Now, while Father Tom's story is indeed extraordinary, I don't want you to think that in order to make an impact-in order to make a difference-you have to move to Haiti. It is far simpler than that. Fran-a very smart, very insightful woman-explained it once very well.
We were traveling back from one of our trips to Haiti. A member of my staff who came with us on the trip left Haiti feeling very troubled by what she had seen and feeling absolutely helpless because the problems in Haiti are so overwhelming and seemingly impossible to overcome. But, Fran took her aside and explained that it isn't about your ability or inability to solve everything or fix all of the problems of a desperate world. Rather, it is about doing what you can do in your own way-however big or small-to help ease the suffering.
Our youngest daughter, 12 year old Anna, for example, tries to ease the suffering in her own way by working with her Girl Scouts troop to collect pencils for students her age at Father Tom's schools. You see, you don't have to cross borders to make a difference. All you have to do is choose to reach out, as many of you already have done during your time here at Walsh.
Like graduating senior Bryan Badar-stand up Bryan. Bryan has chosen to use his time and energy to collect food for Harvest for Hunger.
Or Megan Daubert-stand up Megan. Megan has chosen to use her communication skills to make a difference by promoting and publicizing the Children's Miracle Network Dance Marathon.
Or Miguel Chavez-you, too, need to stand up, Miguel. Miguel has chosen to serve his community by participating in the Appalachian Pilgrimage and by being an AIDS benefit performer and by working with the Take Back the Night Domestic Violence program.
Or, all the students who are part of the Residence Life staff, who helped organize a charity "bowl-a-thon" to raise over $1200 for a local family who unexpectedly found themselves in need of financial assistance. Or Mick Cramer, the son of Mary Ann Cramer. Mary Ann works in the Walsh cafeteria. Mick is part of an Army medic unit and will be sent over to Iraq very soon.
Or Scott Robertson, the 23 year old son of Kathy Robertson. Kathy works with the Walsh custodial staff. Scott is serving in Saudi Arabia. He has a two and a half year old son and a four week-old daughter, whom he has not seen yet, waiting for him at home.
Again, our journeys in life are about the choices we make. Throughout your life, each of you will be faced with the choice to either use or not use your God-given talents-your own unique gifts. Choose to utilize your gifts. As my wife Fran said, maybe you can't do everything-maybe you're not good at everything. But do what you can do. No one can ask more of you, and you should expect no less of yourself.
Along your journeys, you will have to take some chances. So, dare to take a chance. As Paul said in his second letter to Timothy:
"For this reason, I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God which is in you.... For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline."
The biggest regrets in my life have been concerning things I did not do-the times I was timid-the chances I did not take. My friend and colleague, Congressman Henry Hyde, has expressed it very well. He spoke about the end of one's life and the final judgment. This is what he said:
"The sins of omission will be what weigh you down; not the things you have done wrong, the chances you've taken, but the things you have failed to do. The times you stepped back, the times you did not speak out."
Then he quotes St. Ambrose:
"Not only for every idle word, but for every idle silence must we all render an account...."
The sins of omission are what will, at the last moment, weigh us down more than anything else, and are what we will be truly sorry for in our lives. We will be sorry for what we did not do-the times when we stepped back, the times when we blinked, the times when we said, "No, I just can't do that." When I look at the crisis of AIDS, or at the crisis of poverty, or the crisis of young children just literally starving to death in the world, it's our failure to act or our slowness in acting that is really what will weigh heavy on us.
Let me tell you about a little boy we met in Haiti last year by the name of Francois. He lived at the Sisters of Charity orphanage in Port-au-Prince, where they take in very sick children. Fran and I were walking around at the orphanage seeing and holding children in varying stages of medical distress. We entered one room and looked down, and there on the concrete floor was this little boy.
It took me awhile to figure out that this little boy, Francois, was dying right in front of my eyes. He was dying of AIDS. Weighing no more than 15 pounds, he looked to be just a few months old, but he was really more like four or five years old. He could no longer take in any food, and the good people caring for him had him on IVs trying to get some nourishment in him. The volunteers there were trying to comfort him, but little Francois was clearly going to die, and he was going to die in a matter of days.
But then, we walked into another room, and we saw a little boy, who looked to be about eight or nine years old-about the age now of one of my grandchildren and not much different than the age of my daughter Anna. I looked at this little boy, and he was happy and looked to be healthy, and I felt a little better. But then I started talking to one of the nuns, and she told me that this little boy was also HIV-positive. And, the reality is that unless he gets the treatment drugs he needs, which he won't unless things change, then he, too, is going to die. That is why we need to take bold chances-why we need to take some risks to save this little boy and millions of others just like him around the world.
So today, I challenge you to take a chance on life. As hockey great, Wayne Gretzky, once said, "You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take." He's right. Don't be timid. Don't be afraid. Dare to travel outside of the "comfortable Western world."
Dare to love and to care-understanding all the while that love and caring command a terrible price. Someone once said that grief and loss is the price we all pay for love. Few of us make it through life without immense tragedy and pain. But, the other option-not caring and not loving-is untenable. It would make every day unbearable.
Dare to make a difference in your own unique way. If you enjoy books, read to a child. If you are patient and kind, be a mentor to a young person. If you are a good listener, be a good friend to someone. If you are a parent, just spend time with your children.
It's really that simple. It's as simple as choosing to care about people and letting them know you care, because people matter. Relationships matter.
So, when you are debating with yourself over whether or not you have time to visit an old friend, or when you are putting off helping your child with his or her homework because you have work to do, or when you think you are too busy to call your parents or your grandparents or siblings or friends, remember the sins of omission, because the times that we don't act-the times when we don't utilize our gifts-are the times we can never get back. So, my advice is very simple-just go ahead and be bold-take some chances-and, as I understand they like to say in the recent Starsky and Hutch movie-DO IT! You won't regret it.
And now, in just a few minutes, you will receive your diplomas and leave the security of this beautiful shire of Walsh University-the comforts of your hobbit holes-and commence your own journeys "there and back again." You will experience your own adventures and create your own tales and face your own choices.
Years down the road, people are going to ask you-your own children probably when they graduate-"Who was your graduation speaker and what did he say?" Here's what I want you to remember. You don't need remember my name or what I do or that I bear a striking resemblance to hobbit Bilbo Baggins! Instead, just remember that life is a continuing journey filled with choices. Along the way, choose to do what matters. Choose to use your gifts. Life is too short to waste what God has given you.
Again, to the class of 2004, congratulations and thank for inviting me to share your very special day.