HBO Real Time with Bill Maher - Transcript
HBO Real Time with Bill Maher - Transcript
Friday, September 16, 2005
BREAK IN TRANSCRIPT
MAHER:...All right, you're a very, very good crowd, and I appreciate that. We've got a great show. We've got Willie Brown. We've got Joy Behar and P.J. O'Rourke, they're all here. [applause] [cheers] A little later on, I'll be speaking with Dan Senor. But first, he is the United States Senator from New York , and serves on the Senate Judiciary Committee, the Honorable Charles Schumer. Hey! [applause] [cheers] [reacting to Schumer's lack of a tie] Oh, casual. So, you saw President Bush without a suit and tie. You went with the same look.
SEN. CHARLES SCHUMER [via satellite]: Exactly.
MAHER: I don't know if that's wise, to imitate him. [laughter] But, all right, I saw you this week at the hearings, of course. And I have to say, it made the steroid hearings look meaningful. [laughter] What was the point of this? I mean, I - it seemed just like a charade. I mean, you guys say to the nominee, "We want to know what you think about stuff." And he says, "Well, I don't have to tell you." And you guys say, "Come on!" [laughter] And he says, "Well, I'm not going to do it, I want the job so bad." And then it's Biden's turn. [laughter] I know that's not a question, but I'm asking for a comment. [laughter]
SCHUMER: Well, he answered a few questions. There were a few things we felt better about. But you're right. He avoided a whole lot of questions. I got so exasperated, I asked him for his favorite movie. [laughter] And after - first, he said, you know, he likes a movie with good acting and good scenery and good cinematography. And I said, "Well, what's your favorite movie?" And he wouldn't answer. And I said, "Well, what do you think of ' Casablanca '?" He said, "Well, it's well-established law that ' Casablanca ' is a good movie." [laughter]
MAHER: Yeah.
SCHUMER: Finally, I got out of him two movies-
MAHER: [overlapping] For a guy as-
SCHUMER: Two movies. One was-
MAHER: Right.
SCHUMER: One was-
MAHER: "North by Northwest."
SCHUMER: "North by Northwest." And one was-
MAHER: "Dr. Zhivago."
SCHUMER: "Dr. Zhivago."
MAHER: Really controversial choices.
SCHUMER: I was lucky - right, well, I was glad he didn't say "The Manchurian Candidate." [laughter] [applause]
MAHER: Yeah, for a guy-
SCHUMER: [overlapping] But, seriously-
MAHER: For a guy who kept saying he wasn't a politician, he sure said nothing a lot.
SCHUMER: Yeah, well, he-
MAHER: No offense.
SCHUMER: You know, his job is really to answer questions. And particularly because we didn't have much of a record about him before. He always was arguing for somebody else. And I think there was a lot of disappointment that he wasn't forthcoming. We do know, I mean - we had a nominee a couple of years ago, Miguel Estrada, who said absolutely nothing. And we blocked him. Roberts said more than him, in all fairness to Roberts. But my view is that somebody should - who wants this very high position - has an obligation to tell us of his views, and he didn't. And that's one of the things we're now grappling with, because we don't know enough about him on so many issues.
MAHER: Well, speaking of rubber-stamping candidates, though - and I've been very hard on President Bush on Katrina, because I thought the main problem with the disaster is that he appointed a crony to be the head of FEMA. Fredo Corleone basically-[laughter] [applause]-was in charge of this. [laughter] [applause]
SCHUMER: He might have - he might have gotten the job done better.
MAHER: Yeah. And certainly the president deserves the lion's share of the blame for that. But then I saw this week in the paper that the Senate passed the first FEMA director, who was also wildly unqualified, 91-0.
SCHUMER: Right.
MAHER: That was before 9/11. And then this moron, Mike Brown, gets passed after 9/11 - after 9/11 - to the job of Federal Emergency Management, also unanimously, with less than an hour of hearings. Now, don't you guys deserve some of the blame for that?
SCHUMER: Well, Bill, if you heard that the nominee was head of the - what was it - International Arabian Horse Dealers' Association-
MAHER: Yes. [laughter]
SCHUMER: Wouldn't you vote right away on him, too? [laughter] [a second wave of laughter]
MAHER: But - but, really, Senator. [laughter] I mean, I'm-
SCHUMER: You're right. I think the Senate deserves blame for-
MAHER: Okay.
SCHUMER: You can be sure the next - the next nominee, whomever he is, isn't going to get such quick treatment, no question about it.
MAHER: Okay, well, that's good. [applause][cheers] So let me - so let me ask you about the money that's getting passed out. I mean, as soon as the hurricane was over, you guys - immediate $10 billion. Then, in less time than you could say "Terri Schiavo"-[laughter]-another $51.8 billion - is that $51.8 billion that you passed, the president signed? I mean, how did you have the time to even know that quickly how you come up with that figure? That seems like an awful lot of money. It looks to me like you feel guilty. You remind me of Kobe Bryant. [laughter] [applause]
SCHUMER: Well, you know, I think we did talk - I spent some time talking to Mary Landrieu, the senator. And when you heard, you know, from her, not only just of seeing the pictures, which, of course, wrenched every one of our hearts, but the enormity of the damage and the recovery, and there was so much to do. I just spoke to somebody who owns a hotel there. He said the hotel wasn't damaged. I said, "Good, so you can open." He said, "No, there are no employees near the hotel.
MAHER: Right.
SCHUMER: So it's just a huge undertaking. And my view is, we should spend the money. We should bring New Orleans and the Gulf Coast back. My worry is not the $51 billion. It'll probably be more than that. But how well will they spend it? And will they start? You know, they really are sort of making it political. Karl Rove is in charge now. [audience reacts]
MAHER: Yeah, I wanted to ask you about that.
SCHUMER: Well, go right ahead.
MAHER: Karl Rove, the architect. But he's not really an architect, is he? [laughter] [applause] [cheers] It astounds me. I said this last week: "Does Bush know more than three people?" [laughter]
SCHUMER: It's - well, I have to tell you, Bill, this is sort of - you know, they really do not - Bush has never - president has never cared about governing, making government work. They dislike government.
MAHER: Right.
SCHUMER: You know, why would someone become a banker if they hated money? Well, why does someone go into government if they hate government? But so many of-
MAHER: [overlapping] Because they love money. [laughter]
SCHUMER: Yeah, I guess. Good point. [applause] [cheers]
MAHER: They are bankers. They're just bankers with government jobs.
SCHUMER: Yeah, you're right. But anyway-
MAHER: But are you guys going to say something?
SCHUMER: [overlapping]-we've never caught up with them.
MAHER: Are you going to stop this Karl Rove appointment? Can you?
SCHUMER: No, I think it's just an executive appointment, unless they form a new agency.
MAHER: But can't you embarrass them?
SCHUMER: Well, that we can. [laughter] And, you know, here are some of the things they're doing already. First, of course, you saw, no-bid contracts-
MAHER: Right.
SCHUMER: Halliburton, what does that sound like? Another place where they really have not figured out how to make things work. And then, now all of a sudden, they want to get rid of prevailing wage laws. Just today we heard that the Justice Department was asked - all the U.S. attorneys who represented the areas along the Mississippi , "Well, did the Sierra Club sue you and slow you down?"
So, if, you know, they're going to make this into a political football, with all the people suffering, and with all the - I mean, frankly, the president has been hurt badly by this, and not undeservedly - they're going to lose even more. I just wish they would learn their lesson and try to really help the people who need help and solve this problem in a genuine way instead of playing politics. [applause] [cheers]
MAHER: Thank you for making time for us. I hope you hold their feet to the fire. Thank you, Senator Chuck Schumer. [applause]
SCHUMER: Thank you, Bill.
MAHER: Thank you, Senator.
BREAK IN TRANSCRIPT
http://www.safesearching.com/billmaher/print/transcripts.shtml